James Baldwin once said “To be a Negro in this country and to be relatively conscious is to be in rage all the time.” For me, my anger is slowly hardening and replaced with numbness as injustice continues in various forms.
Being Black in America means at some point, you’ll go from shock to anger to numbness at how often things happen to people who look like you. No matter how optimistic you want to be, you start losing hope that things will ever change.
What happened Saturday was the justice system reminding us that it’s not fair. George Zimmerman, due to his legal team doing a great job, wasn’t found guilty of killing Trayvon Martin despite initiating the confrontation. A kid is dead because of racial profiling and perhaps winning a fight he didn’t expect to be in and yet his killer walked.
Martin’s reputation became fair game during a trial instead of Zimmerman’s tendencies for violence and other behaviors. Despite a fair trial, all Zimmerman is guilty of being a vigilante who disobeyed orders and started a fight. Manslaughter was an option and yet the jury could not to find him even guilty of that. More or less, Martin is somehow responsible for his own death.
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| Trayvon Martin and Oscar Grant. Two victims of the same killer - American prejudice. |
But real question. How is this any different than how I felt about Oscar Grant exactly three years ago? Or Sean Bell? Or little Aiyana Jones? Or Chavis Carter? Or Amadou Diallo? How can I be shocked when this happens like clockwork?
I’m tired of seeing innocent people killed and nobody answering for it. The fact that Grant’s death saw a police officer get only seven months in jail is mind-blowing. Yet when you consider the killers of Bell, Jones, Diallo and more were exonerated, that’s actually a rare victory.
All I am right now is numb. And frankly, I’m tired of feeling that but it’s reality sinking in about this sick world.
